Thursday, June 28, 2007

Hate Mail

Who loves hate mail more than us? Here's the latest.

From: XXX@XXXXX.com
To: chinadirt@gmail.com
Date: Jun 25, 2007 2:15 PM
subject: ASIAN WOMEN

"WHITE WOMEN ARE STARTING TO REALIZE THAT YOUR NOT FIRST CHOICE. IF A WHITE GUY HAS THE PICK BETWEEN A WESTERN WOMAN AND AN ASIAN WOMAN- HE MOST LIKELY WILL PICK THE ASIAN WOMAN. OPEN YOUR EYES `LADIES`."

(Email ends)

(New Email)
From: XXX@XXXXX.com
To: chinadirt@gmail.com
Date: Jun 25, 2007 2:18 PM
Subject: ASIAN WOMEN
" ,LIKE MOST WESTERN MEN LOVE ASIAN WOMEN. QUIT WHINING AND FIND AN ASIAN BOYFRIEND."


Uh... now we're not quite sure what we did to this guy to make him SO angry that he apparently had to take a breather in his tirade. Also, please. Give the Caps Lock key a rest. Even if your message isn't so moronic, the fact that it's in all Caps makes you look like an idiot... an idiot that has to take breaks in between expressing a 5 second thought.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Oh the French...

Will the French never stop giving us things to make fun of them about? Not today! Thanks to XXXX XXXXX for helping us pick up the slack.

"My story is when I went to an event for work. at the start of the evening I met a charming French bloke who worked at some kind of bank/financial institute.

After the event we went to the next venue for a private dinner, ie more networking. during the networking we all relaxed (ie got pissed) and much fun was had by all. Making the rounds during the evening I bumped into the French bloke again and we started chatting and got along great. He seemed really fun, friendly, and was easy on the eye. Then, after much flirting and chatting, he noticed my gorgeous (Chinese) colleague and promptly started chatting her up instead. As she looks a bit like a supermodel, I shrugged it off. "Dem's da breaks" as they say and didn't think anything of it.

As it turns out, however, my colleague was interested in someone else, and gave the Frenchman the brush-off as soon as she could. At which point he turned back to me and started smooth-talking again. I clearly looked easier or something... He started off with smouldering looks, then leant closer and asked, "what do you say we go over to that corner there" at which point I replied, "uh ... why?" He then said, in all seriousness, "because I want to pull your dress down and see your breasts." Horrified, I tried my best not to give him the filthiest look possible, and, as I was still technically at work, didn't think it' d be a good idea to thump him. I tried laughing this off and saying, "well, y'know, that's not that good an idea ..." before swiftly changing the subject trying to forget it and cover up any potential embarrassment. But he persisted, "seriously, I think we should get together. why don't you want to?"

I told him that I was less than tempted after seeing him cracking on to my colleague for the best part of the last hour. I didn't think that was very sincere. Then I said something along the lines of someone so fickle would have trouble holding down a girlfriend. He then admitted that he did have a girlfriend after all ... but their relationship was fine. Obviously apart from him cheating on her at every turn. I made my hasty excuses after this revelation.

Perhaps that's not so much of a shocking story, but you said you were running low on material!"

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Walking in the city

Living fairly close to the bar areas of the city, I've taken a liking to walking everywhere especially as the weather turns warmer. Usually, I'm fairly paranoid about safety and back in my home country, I would never wander out into the city late at night without at least one or two friends in tow when walking anywhere. Though Beijing is a big city with it's share of big city crimes, in the bar areas it's crowded enough that I feel fairly comfortable going solo when en route to a destination.

Beijing's catcall to daylight ratio is an inverse one and as the sky darkens, the multitude of catcalls a solitary girl receives goes up exponentially. However local Chinese catcalls and expat catcalls vary substantially in delivery and subject matter. Like my home country, the expat catcalls here hinges on a yelled compliment ("Hey girl, you're lookin fiiiine!") or a inquiry as to your well being ("How you doin'?"). The local Chinese catcalls though are usually yelled out an open window of a car and always involve you joining them for a drink or for a ride in their car. Come to think of it, perhaps the local Chinese catcall isn't so much a catcall but a feeler for if you're a prostitute (hooker-call?).

What's the best catcall (or hooker-call) you've gotten? It's been eons since we last posted so we'll see if anyone really still reads this blog.