We've gotten off our lazy asses and have managed to hit Ctrl+C and Ctrl+V in that sequence. Thanks for the entry M. Keep them coming girls! While we don't advocate racial stereotyping, we figure the Parisians have already been made fun of so... why not add another country into the melee?
"I'd like to make an addition to the China Dirt lexico - Former Eastern Bloc Sleaze, or FEBS for short. Don't get me wrong. I'm not racist or anything (I'm half Polish/half Czech, by the way), but there are so many of these guys around town (apparently all here on "beesneez") that it definitely deserves a category of its own.
Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. You've been FEBBED if he:
a. his wardrobe consists of mesh muscle shirts
b. sounds like Borat's cousin
c. hits on anything that has a pulse
I've been seeing a FEBS for about a month now, after a disastrous relationship with another for about two years (okay, so I have soft spot. shoot me). Granted, some FEBS are pretty charming at first (it's like finding really cute vintage Italian or French designer at a second hand store). And they're really good at chess and stuff (no joke, all of them are like Superduper grandmasters or something). And, to be fair, they can be pretty chevliarous. But after a while, Count Dracula shows his true face. The FEBS they start expecting you to behave like you're thier property.
So being the redblooded southern girl that I am, I'm like, "Fuck. That. I'm AMERICAN. You can't treat me like your serf!" And then the FEBS accuses me of invading Iraq or ruining his culture with McDonalds or some bullshit. Ugh!
Example: We went to Nan Jie last Friday with some of his Euro/Latin friends. We get in and he literally pats me on the behind and tells me to "go graze." Maybe his English is not stellar, but am I his goat or something? I give him the benefit of the doubt and I go get a few drinks at the bar. I'm talking to this really cute Chinese guy, and my FEBS gets really jealous and start making fun of the guy by going "Chingching chongchong" and pulling his eyelids like he's Asian. Uhh... I couldn't believe how insensitive/stupid he was. Is he in seventh grade?
Here's the kicker: my FEBS tells me, verbaitim, "Man, talk. Women, listen." Earth to FEBS: Misogyny does not get you laid.
PS. I haven't spoken to him for five days. I heard he was hitting on drunk girls at a party on Saturday night. ugh."